


Time is a Funny Thing

by GryffindorTom



Series: Time Turners and Changed Timelines [1]
Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Correcting Mistakes, F/M, Next Generation, Sirius Doesn't Die, Time Travel, memory blocks
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-09-17
Updated: 2016-09-17
Packaged: 2018-07-12 13:06:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7104766
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GryffindorTom/pseuds/GryffindorTom
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>One should always remember not to mess with Time Tuners, especially not on Christmas Day...even if it's all because of James Potter and his half bother Hugo... A parody of all those Next Generation meets their parents past stories. HP/HG, AW/MP</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 01 - Prolouge - The Time Travellers Visit

**Author's Note:**

> A Series of Firsts present…  
> Time is a Funny Thing – Rating T  
> Chapter 01 – The Time Travelers Visit  
> Summary – Following events in the 'Confessions', and 'The New Batch', one should always remember not to mess with Time Tuners, especially not on Christmas Day...even if it's all because of James Potter and his half bother Hugo... A Next Generation meets their parents past story.  
> Pairings – Harry/Hermione, Arthur/Molly, Sirius/Amelia  
> Warnings – Contains some swearing, mild swearing and Dumbledore bashing

**Number 12, Grimmauld Place, London, England**

**New Timeline – 19th December 1995**

_'I'm not the weapon after all!'_ thought Harry. His heart swelled with happiness and relief, and he felt like joining in as they heard Sirius tramping past their door toward Buckbeak's room, singing "God Rest Ye Merry, Hippogriffs" at the top of his voice.

How could he have dreamed of returning to Privet Drive for Christmas? Sirius's delight at having the house full again, and especially at having Harry back, was infectious. He was no longer their sullen host of the summer; now he seemed determined that everyone should enjoy themselves as much, if not more, than they would have done at Hogwarts, and he worked tirelessly in the run-up to Christmas Day, cleaning and decorating with their help, so that by the time they all went to bed on Christmas Eve the house was barely recognizable.

The tarnished chandeliers were no longer hung with cobwebs but with garlands of holly and gold and silver streamers; magical snow glittered in heaps over the threadbare carpets; a great Christmas tree, obtained by Mundungus and decorated with live fairies, blocked Sirius's family tree from view; and even the stuffed elf heads on the hall wall wore Father Christmas hats and beards.

Harry awoke on Christmas morning to find a stack of presents at the foot of his bed and Ron already halfway through opening his own, rather larger, pile.

"Good haul this year," he informed Harry through a cloud of paper. "Thanks for the Broom Compass, it's excellent, beats Hermione's — she's got me a homework planner —"

Harry sorted through his presents and found one with Hermione's handwriting on it. She had given him a book as well that resembled a diary, except that it said things like "Do it today or later you'll pay!" every time he opened a page.

Sirius and Lupin had given Harry a set of excellent books entitled Practical Defensive Magic and Its Use Against the Dark Arts, which had superb, moving colour illustrations of all the counter jinxes and hexes it described. Harry flicked through the first volume eagerly; he could see it was going to be highly useful in his plans for the D.A.

Hagrid had sent a furry brown wallet that had fangs, which were presumably supposed to be an anti-theft device, but unfortunately prevented Harry putting any money in without getting his fingers ripped off.

Tonks's present was a small, working model of a Firebolt, which Harry watched fly around the room, wishing he still had his full-size version; Ron had given him an enormous box of Every-Flavour Beans; Mr. and Mrs. Weasley the usual hand-knitted jumper and some mince pies; and Dobby, a truly dreadful painting that Harry suspected had been done by the elf himself. He had just turned it upside down to see whether it looked better that way when, with a loud crack, Fred and George Apparated at the foot of his bed.

Suddenly they heard a thud in the hallway and everyone went out to investigate, pulling wands out of their pockets or from tableside cabinets.

"THIS BETTER NOT BE ONE OF YOUR PRANKS JAMES SIRIUS POTTER OR SO HELP ME- "

"Calm down Mom. I just 'accidentally' pressed the button on the time tuner. Dad shouldn't have left it out." The raven-haired boy told his mother. "Looks like you, Dad and Unspeakable Boot need to fix it...again."

"James, you knew what would happen. Last time you messed with time tuners, we ended up messing up Aunt Angelina's wedding to Uncle George. Do you remember what he did to you afterwards?" The second raven-haired boy reminded his brother. He noticed his mother sobbing and then noticed the audience they had. The bushy haired lady stood up and ran over to Fred, hugging him in the same way Molly Weasley would.

"Oh Fred, you're alive." She sobbed. She turned to Sirius and hugged him too. "Don't you dare, under any circumstances, teach James your pranks otherwise it won't be your deranged cousin that kills you, it'll be me who does," she told him quietly. "On the other hand, it's been ages since I've been able to hug you Padfoot."

"Mom." One of the girls, one with black bushy hair, said "You look pretty at my age."

"Thanks Rosie." The older woman said. She looked at her younger version and smiled. "Its still weird being Hermione Potter!"

"Alright, who are you and how did you get here?" Mad Eye Moody snarled to the new arrivals.

"Allow me to introduce myself. I'm prank expert James Sirius Potter, named after Granddad Prongs and Padfoot. Along with Cousin Fred, we make up the Beaters for Gryffindor. My friends in the New Marauders call me Rebel because I end up in more detentions than Padfoot, Granddad Prongs, Uncle Gred and Uncle Forge have ever been in combined. Oh, and I hate my birth mom" The older boy said, noticing the maniacal grins of the twins.

"Who was your birth mother?" Molly asked, confused about why someone would hate their parents.

"Ginny Weasley." The other girl, her red hair shining in the Christmas light. "She cheated on daddy several times and so daddy divorced her."

"Did you hear that Fred?" George asked

"I sure did George-" Fred replied

"Sounds like Harrikins-"

"Had a prankster for a son." Finishing together. The older woman threw a shoe at Fred in embarrassment. The second raven-haired lad hit James on the side then pushed him back. He turned to the assembled crowd.

"I'm Albus Severus Potter, unfortunately named after Professors Dumbledore and Snape. I tried to beat Fathers record of trying to become the youngest Seeker but didn't get to as my sister Rose got the position." The second child said, smiling at Harry. "There again if it weren't for the Slytherins being stupid, she wouldn't have got the position. Like Father I enjoy DADA, especially as he has taught me before I went to Hogwarts, just like my brothers and sisters.

"Oh, by the way dad, it's a pity you and mom didn't dance at the Yule Ball as I overheard her telling my sister Amelia and mom Susan about the Yule Ball, and that she had it ruined by a certain redhead. Also, after your third year, mom fell in love with the real you but Grandfather James's portrait says it's the stubbornness in the genes given to you by Grandmother Lily that causes you not to notice her yet." He continued, smiling. "At least you made the correct choice when Dad divorced mine, James and Lily's birth mom, Ginny Weasley, and got with our 'real' mom, Hermione Granger. There again, both mom and dad were having affairs at the time, mom sleeping with Draco Malfoy, Neville Longbottom and Dean Thomas."

"You...you've spoken to...James and Lily's portrait?" Sirius asked, turning to Albus, "Where is it?"

"It's in the Potter family vault, along with the one that you started to have made of yourself." The older Hermione replied. "At the moment, only Harry can get to it as his parents will made him the head of the Noble and Most Ancient House of Potter. That means he's Lord Potter, along with being head of the Great Alliance."

"The Great Alliance? Lord Potter? I don't know what you mean?" Harry said, looking confused. "I didn't know Mom and Dad made a will!"

"Didn't Professor Dumbledore tell you?" the older Hermione asked "I know I remember Padfoot was going to tell you this week but the way I remember it, he never did. Hang on a sec, I just want to try something."

She waved her wand over the assembled crowd in a complicated pattern, muttering incantations. "Looks like you've all had memory charms put on you. Even Molly and Arthur have had them!"

"How...how do we get them removed?" the younger Hermione asked, annoyed that someone altered their memories. "And who the hell did it?"

"Firstly, Gringotts have a ritual which removes blocks and all dark magic from you," she replied, noting the anger from everyone, "And it's all because of a prophecy, the thing that is being guarded in the Department of Mysteries."


	2. 02 – Diagon Alley

_Previously on Time is a Funny Thing..._

_"THIS BETTER NOT BE ONE OF YOUR PRANKS JAMES SIRIUS POTTER OR SO HELP ME- "_

_"Calm down Mom. I just 'accidentally' pressed the button on the time tuner. Dad shouldn't have left it out." The raven-haired boy told his mother. "Looks like you, Dad and Unspeakable Boot need to fix it...again."_

_Turning to the audience that had gathered, James introduced himself. "I'm prank expert James Sirius Potter, named after Granddad Prongs and Padfoot. Oh, and I hate my birth mom!"_

_The second raven-haired lad hit James on the side then pushed him back. He turned to the assembled crowd._

_"I'm Albus Severus Potter, unfortunately named after Professors Dumbledore and Snape. I tried to beat Fathers record of trying to become the youngest Seeker but didn't get to as my sister Rose got the position." The second child said, smiling at Harry. "There again if it weren't for the Slytherins being stupid, she wouldn't have got the position. Oh, by the way dad, it's a pity you and mom didn't dance at the Yule Ball as I overheard her telling my sister Amelia and mom Susan about the Yule Ball, and that she had it ruined by a certain redhead. Also, after your third year, mom fell in love with the real you but Grandfather James's portrait says it's the stubbornness in the genes given to you by Grandmother Lily that causes you not to notice her yet."_

_"You...you've spoken to...James and Lily's portrait?" Sirius asked, turning to Albus, "Where is it?"_

_"It's in the Potter family vault, along with the one that you started to have made of yourself." The older Hermione replied. "At the moment, only Harry can get to it as his parents will made him the head of the Noble and Most Ancient House of Potter. That means he's Lord Potter, along with being head of the Great Alliance."_

_"The Great Alliance? Lord Potter? I don't know what you mean?" Harry said, looking confused. "I didn't know Mom and Dad made a will!"_

_"Didn't Professor Dumbledore tell you?" the older Hermione asked "I know I remember Padfoot was going to tell you this week but the way I remember it, he never did. Hang on a sec, I just want to try something."_

_She waved her wand over the assembled crowd in a complicated pattern, muttering incantations. "Looks like you've all had memory charms put on you. Even Molly and Arthur have had them!"_

_"How...how do we get them removed?" the younger Hermione asked, annoyed that someone altered their memories. "And who the hell did it?"_

_"Firstly, Gringotts have a ritual which removes blocks and all dark magic from you," she replied, noting the anger from everyone, "And it's all because of a prophecy, the thing that is being guarded in the Department of Mysteries."_

**_Diagon Alley, City of Westminster, England_ **

**_New Timeline – 19th December 1995_ **

Sirius was in shock. He had an idea that the Headmaster wanted to guard a weapon in the Department of Mysteries, but he had not realised that the weapon was a prophecy, one which was affecting his godson more than himself.

Then there were the revelations. The first one was that Harry's children had gone back in time, and they had brought, in the case of James, Albus and their little sister Lily, who had introduced herself to everyone in a way that tears to the Black heir in the way she looked exactly like her late grandmother, their stepmother, and in the other 4, those being Rose Granger-Potter (who Sirius realised was named after his best friends mother-in-law), Hugo Granger-Potter (named after Hugo Evans, his great-grandfather), Amelia Bones (who the older Hermione had said was named after the DMLE head, and her great-aunt) and Arthur Bones (who was named after the only true father influence, and father-in-law, Arthur Weasley), one of their two moms, Hermione Potter.

When he had asked why the two children had the surname Bones, Hermione explained that Arthur was the heir of the Ancient and Most Noble House of Bones in their timeline, as both he and Amelia had been killed, and that Susan had married Harry in their timeline by virtue of the contract between Sirius and Amelia turning into a Line Continuance Contract between Harry and Susan.

The other revelation was that Albus Dumbledore wasn't as Light as everyone thought he was, especially when the older Hermione had helped by making everyone realise that they had been subjected to Memory Charms, and that it was Remus Lupin that had worked out that it was Dumbledore who could be responsible for the Charms being put in place.

Walking through Diagon Alley, hidden under a charm as opposed to being in his Animagus form, he was brought out of his thoughts by the sight of one person in front of him, the person who he had been in love with, and was engaged to until that fateful day...

Amelia Bones.

Sirius remembered the day that he had been told by Amelia that she had been pregnant, had been being the correct way to say it as she had lost the child. They had been coming off patrol in Diagon Alley, enforcing Ministry Ordinance 743 which prohibited people from inciting a riot, following an article in the Daily Prophet which had almost started a riot. Having arrived in the Headquarters of the Department of Magical Law Enforcement, when Augustus Rookwood, an Unspeakable who was attached to the department attacked.

He knew that if it wasn't for Senior Auror Alastor Moody and Investigating Auror, Kingsley Shacklebolt stopping the fiend, along with Fabian Prewitt's efforts by rushing two Healers that Sirius knew, Hestia Jones and his cousin Andromeda Tonks, to the Auror Office, he would have lost Amelia as well as the baby she was carrying.

What had hurt Sirius the most was when his cousin Andromeda had told him that Amelia had miscarried and the curse that Rookwood used on her caused her to be unable to carry any more children either. It was this strain on the relationship, and then the passing of his friends James and Lily two weeks later, that caused Sirius to forget about his godson and chase Peter Pettigrew instead, the day him being captured and arrested by the Aurors for murder being his wedding day.

-Time is a Funny Thing-

Amelia could see that there was a disillusioned person in front of her as she was walking down the Alley with her niece, Susan, her molecule being able to see disillusioned persons along with those under most Invisibility Cloaks, the only Cloak she had been unable to see through being the one that her fiancé's best friend, James Potter, had owned.

Looking at the outline of the person, she could have sworn that it was the one person that her department was meant to hunt for, despite her knowledge of his innocence in this case despite his habit of getting in trouble otherwise, if one could call Sirius Black innocent that is!

Amelia was engaged to Sirius when her niece, Susan, was an infant, weeks before the death of her two brothers, Henry and Edgar, but then he had got locked up on their wedding day. She had known that Sirius was never the secret keeper to your parents, but despite her efforts to get him a trial, she had been told by Cornelius Fudge, Lucius Malfoy, Delores Umbridge and Albus Dumbledore on several occasions that her interests, being engaged to Black, had caused a conflict of interest.

"Conflict of interest my arse!" Amelia had shouted at the time when Dumbledore had denied the trial request. She had lost her temper that much at the time that she had transfigured him into a goat!

Approaching the disillusioned person, she dragged him into a side alley and removed the charm to see her suspicions confirmed. Slapping Sirius, she knew that she wanted to give him a more personal celebration for escaping the Prison that she had tried to close on several occasions.

Kissing him, she had the one thing that made Sirius smile. "Bones Manor…now!"

She knew that she had to be quick returning Sirius, especially as her godson was in Diagon Alley with the Weasleys plus some other people who she did not recognise, but she knew one thing…she needed him, and sharpish!

**_The Vaults, Gringotts Wizarding Bank, Diagon Alley, London, England_ **

**_New Timeline – 19th December 1995_ **

Harry looked around to see his godfather falling out of the Floo connection of his account manager's office, running into the area where the carts for the vaults were, his clothes dishevelled from what looked like a quick dressing following sex that he had.

As the party of 11, consisting of Harry, both the original Hermione and the one from the other timeline, the seven children from the other timeline and Sirius, all boarded the cart along with Griphook, Harry was about to scold Sirius when the younger Hermione placed her arms round him.

Noticing that she was tense from the ride, Harry gave Hermione a kiss on the cheek, the first ever kiss he had given her. He was, however, unaware that the young girl that had called herself Lily was slightly tense, as if she felt that something had changed between her timeline and the current timeline.

As the ride ended at the Vault for the Ancient and Most Noble House of Potter, Harry remembered how, when he had put his family ring on, he had fainted from the pressure that it had caused in his head where his scar was, something which a Curse Breaker who attended the ongoing alarms called a Horcrux, a piece of Voldemort's soul.

As he walked into the Vault, he saw something that caused him to cry with tears of happiness, tears of joy and tears of sorrow. It was a portrait of two people that Harry recognised from photos that Hagrid had gave him, two people who, to protect their son, laid their lives down for him.

"Hello Mum, hello Dad."

**Author's Note:**

> Disclaimer  
> This story uses themes and characters from the Harry Potter series by JK Rowling, whose rights as author are respected. Contains text from Harry Potter and the Order of the Phoenix.  
> Just like "GryffindorTom" on Facebook to get all of the latest news, bits I'm working on, story updates and much more. Please remember to review this story as it helps improve the stories that I write for you guys. It's the only payment, along with adding to community's and favourites that I get for writing these, and I admit I enjoy that payment.  
> Story ID - 056


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